Thoughts On Three Precious Sons

The Gent and I spent a lot of time in prayer and consideration before we felt the Lord tell us to move forward with growing our family (again). To be honest, we thought we were through after Nora. We had always talked about 4 or 6 kids and felt like four was it (I mean, four kids under four was an absolute joy that I would not trade for anything, but it was also an intense time). Our beloved David, our resurrection baby, was not a blessing we asked for, but a gift who was entrusted to us. It is no coincidence he was due right around Easter. His life and death have thinned the veil that separates us from heaven forever.

When we first found out baby Poptart was on the way, we honestly hoped baby would be a girl. We just thought it would be easier all around. But the Lord knows just what our family needs and He has once again blessed us with a precious son. I still have the same concerns that initially made me think a girl would be easier.

It is very painful for people to celebrate that Jacob is finally getting a brother. I want to tell them all that Jacob already has a brother. I remind myself often that many people don't know our story and they have their own sadnesses that they carry and that it is natural and kind for people to be excited about babies. I worry that Poptart will feel pressured to fill David's place in our family and I don't want that pressure to be put on any child ever. Our children are all about two years apart. Nora and Poptart will have four years between them, because that is David's place in the middle. I worry that someone will say something hurtful in front of Jacob along the lines of "you're finally getting a boy." I have a firstborn son. He was not birthed from my body but he is fully and completely my first son. And why are people so obsessed with the Gent "finally getting his boy?" See the complaints above.

Forgive my sensitive mama heart and celebrate with us. We already have two much-loved sons. We are abundantly blessed that the Lord has given us this third son. Feeling Poptart kick and squirm and seeing the incredible, beautiful love his siblings already have for him is a gift. We didn't think we would get to do this again. We are blessed indeed.