Recent Reading

Links I've been reading lately:

Fasting and Feasting

Vapor and Mist

How Do We Prepare Our Children for Suffering

What To Do

Carys Rainn and Paxton Cole

Four Months

Halloween 2016

Thought I'd better post these before Thanksgiving. Here are my munchkins:

baby ballerina


sweet Sophie actually being sweet


princess ballerina


cowboy


Little Bo-Peep


no one wanted to be her sheep


our neighbors gave them way to much candy and the kids had a blast

Nora: 21 Months

This girl...she is definitely her own person and does not get lost in the shadow of her siblings. For better or worse, the Gent and I do not have any compliant, wall-flower children. This month Nora has been talking circles around us, learned to sing, and likes to plop down in my lap to listen to all the big kids' read-aloud books. Nora can often be found sneaking grapes, leftover spaghetti, and anything else she can reach in the refrigerator. She still loves to take care of her baby dolls, does not like to wear pajamas, and likes Curious George stories. Two is coming up for this precious girl!

His name is . . .

Baby Jellybean is named for his great-great-grandfather, David. David means “beloved” and though our son’s earthly life may be short he is no less loved and treasured. One of Granddaddy’s favorite hymns was “His Eye Is on the Sparrow,” such a beautiful song whose lyrics have always spoken truth to my heart.

Let not your heart be troubled; these tender words I hear
And resting on His goodness, I lose my doubt and fear
Though by the path He leadeth, but one step I may see
His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me
His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me

Shalom means “peace of God.” Not just peace as in a sense of tranquility, but peace as in the promise that someday all of creation and its people will be restored to true Shalom. So as we name our son we place our hope in that promise, that all the wrongs will be righted and all the brokenness will be healed. Jesus will return and our glorious restoration is His promise.

Revelation 21:1-5a says: Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.” And he [Jesus] who was seated on the throne said, “Behold, I am making all things new.”

It's a BOY!

The Next Thing

Author's note: You were going to get a cute Nora update today with her 21 month pictures, but Photobucket's website has been down all day so I can't get them to load. Instead you get some sad thoughts from Mama. But happy thoughts to come--Tuesday we should be able to find out if Baby Jellybean is a boy or a girl, and then a few days after that we will make a name announcement. So stay tuned! I'll get to Nora's pictures and Halloween soon, too!

________________________________________________________________________

The next thing. That’s what my days are filled with now. Just doing the next thing and trusting in Jesus every step of the way. Grace upon grace (John 1:16), that is what He has promised us. Grace for each day. Grace for each new day.

There will be a time to write a birth plan, to choose a grave site, to think through a memorial service. Right now I need time to let go of the plans I had, the nursery fabric I wanted, the new car seat we needed to pick out. I need time to grieve the life that will not be, the growing up I will not see, the sibling my children will always be missing. I wanted so much to teach my baby to read. I’m teaching Annie and Jacob right now and so I’ve dwelled on that. This baby and I won’t slug our way through phonics outbursts and snuggle up to read through a Bob book together. I won’t cry as this youngest one goes off to college and those grandbabies won’t ever be.

I don’t grieve for what my baby will “miss,” so to speak, because I know my baby will be with Jesus. Baby will never experience pain or loss or suffering. Baby will be whole and complete and happy. But we who are left behind, we deal with all the losses.

In A Grief Observed, C.S. Lewis put it this way: “If a mother is mourning not for what she has lost but for what her dead child has lost, it is a comfort to believe that the child has not lost the end for which it was created. And it is a comfort to believe that she herself, in losing her chief or only natural happiness, has not lost a greater thing, that she may still hope to "glorify God and enjoy Him forever." A comfort to the God-aimed, eternal spirit within her. But not to her motherhood. The specifically maternal happiness must be written off. Never, in any place or time, will she have her son on her knees, or bathe him, or tell him a story, or plan for his future, or see her grandchild.”

One step at a time, leaning on that grace upon grace, until Christ’s glorious appearing, when “He will swallow up death forever; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from all faces” (Isaiah 25:8).

Del Coronado

A few weeks ago the Gent and I had a chance to spend a long weekend at Del Coronado. It is a beautiful place and the time away came at a good time. Thank you to Honey and Poppa for keeping up with the munchkins, I know it was quite a task!